F106lady
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Post by F106lady on Dec 20, 2008 3:06:13 GMT 9
This story is when I was an A-10 crew chief. The name of the pilot will remain anonymous. Newly arrived at our TDY destination I was part of the maintenance crews that awaited the arrival of our airplanes. It was a lengthy flight from the home base over the mountains. One by one the jets landed. On the spot next door to mine a crew recovered a jet. I watched as the pilot hurriedly jumped out of the cockpit and run to the edge of tarmac to relieve himself. All I could see was his back and the stream as it hit the ground. I shook my head and carried on with my duties, I guess he had assumed there weren’t any females in close enough range to see him. Later that evening the squadron was relaxing at the hotel we were residing in for the TDY. This particular married pilot had a womanizing history, and I had learned of the antics that he had pulled just that very day with another enlisted female. I had enough “liquid” courage in me I decided to play a joke on him  I called him over and said "Major ***** you know when you jumped out of the airplane today I saw you as you were hanging out in the wind" Immediately he got a gleam in his eye, moved in closer and put his arm around me and said “oh you did?” I said “yeah!” I let out a loud vivacious horse laugh at the same time I held my hand up gesturing with my index finger and thumb only about a ½ inch apart to indicate the size of his *ahem* manhood. Immediately his arm dropped and the mood changed. Every time I saw him on that TDY after that I would let out that same laugh and gesture with my hand. He never made a pass at me again.  |
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Post by lindel on Dec 20, 2008 8:04:28 GMT 9
That would've been a sight to see!!
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Post by Gene on Dec 20, 2008 9:44:44 GMT 9
" it " is a good story, but, i don't think i want to see it.   |
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Bullhunter
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Post by Bullhunter on Dec 24, 2008 6:21:05 GMT 9
Nice story F106lady. You will like this one. On a TDY once in West Germany we had 4 aircraft and 6 pilots. Plus 4 of us maintenance troops. We were deployed to a NATO German Air Base and the German Base CO gave us a VW bus and driver. Said the driver and the vehicle were ours during our 5 day deployment. This sounded fantastic. Figured we would get to see some good sights around the area. We all piled into the VW bus and our officers were talking with the driver. We ended up at a large German house and we all went inside. There was a bar so us maintenance troops sat at the bar and ordered drinks as our officer pilots mingled around in the room talking with themselves and our driver. Then all these ladies walked in dressed in skimpy stuff. Right then and there I figured out what we had walked into. We had a very young airman with us and he had this look of "Oh $hit Look" on his face. I looked at him and said, "What, your first time in a juicey girlhouse? - mine too!" The officers all disappeared up stairs with their pick of ladies. I looked back at our young airman and said, "So much for being officers and gentlemen!" "Most of them are likely married." I know what your question is: All 6 officers went upstairs with ladies - how many of the maintenance troops went upstairs? Out of the 4 of us - only one. The young airman, myself, and the NCOIC stayed in the bar. Just one maintenance technician went upstairs. |
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Bullhunter
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Post by Bullhunter on Jan 11, 2009 4:15:06 GMT 9
Some TDY's can get you into some trouble. While stationed in West Germany at Sembach Air Base 1978-1982 our 2 squadrons deployed to Zaragoza Air Base, Spain each year to practice shooting 2.75 WP Rockets at the NATO bomb range. I went on one of these deployments and it lasted about a month. Twelve hour shifts were the norm and if you didn't have work in your career field you helped others who had work. These deployments were great as the pilots need the shooting practice and the aft co-pilots seats were usually empty so us maintenance troops got all the OV-10 Bronco flights we wanted in the aft seat. After the deployment was over we had a 3 day weekend left to enjoy ourselves. It was a weekend of having fun and parties. The last night there in the barracks for some reason a shaving cream fight started in the hall way and day room. More and more troops joined in and I also had to get a piece of the action. I'd at the time was a SSgt with a line-number for TSgt. Well the next morning bright and early we boarded our C-130 for home. It wasn't long after we landed at Sembach that I was galled by the 1st Sgt and had to head to the Orderly Room. Once there the 1st Sgt took me into the CO's office for a rough a$$ chewing. After all I was a SSgt with a line-number for TSgt and the ranking NCO billeted on that floor so I was in-charge. I got yelled at and asked if I wanted to become an Airman or a TSgt. That answer was a pretty simple one. So I quickly said, "A TSgt, Sir! " The CO then asked something like, What the hell is the meaning of a shaving cream fight that messed up the 2nd floor of the barracks causing the maids extra work and a complaint from the base commander? The 1st Sgt quickly added,. "What the hell were you thinking?" ;D These 2 questions required some thought for an answer, but my mind quickly informed me there was no right answer for this.  So, I just blurted out, "Well, it seemed like a fun thing at the time." I was yelled at abit more and told to get out of the orderly room. I kept my line-number and put TSgt on a few months later. Those were the days.  |
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Post by Gene on Jan 11, 2009 7:05:31 GMT 9
well they are gone now.. the usaf is run more like a business than a branch of the armed services...
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Bullhunter
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Post by Bullhunter on Jan 11, 2009 7:16:33 GMT 9
My daughter and her husband both tell me the same thing. It's nolonger my type of air force.
A few friends who retired not that long ago have said they were very glad to reach retirement as things have changed for the worse.
I know not the reason for it, maybe its the war, who knows.
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Post by Gene on Jan 11, 2009 9:49:01 GMT 9
many years ago some info commercial huckster sold a mangement tool to the military called teams and tools or some such nonsense... the urban legend was that it was inspired by the Japanese work ethic... it was a civilian management system that was supposed to streamline the work place... it changed the way the military did business,and, it also changed attitudes toward an almost communistic society in the military hierarchy gene  |
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Post by Jeff Shannon on Jan 13, 2009 0:50:49 GMT 9
My first TDY was to Aviano Italy with the 81st TFW out of Bentwaters/Woodbridge UK. We were flying F-4D’s. Anyway one Friday night a bunch of us went to the club on base. They had put us up at a hotel just past the flight line. Having just turned 18 this TDY was like a birthday present from the Air Force, a trip to Italy!!  We were at the club most of the night and time came to catch the last bus back to the hotel. Now they didn’t park the buses anywhere near the club and we all had to walk a couple of blocks to where they were. We arrive at the designated area and the bus driver said the bus won’t start and he had called base motor pool for another bus and a tow truck. Were all standing around waiting for the bus when Tom says he has to go to the bathroom, and starts off towards a dorm. About 3 minutes go by and all of a sudden we see flashing lights and think “well the tow truck is here, where is the other bus?” turns out it was Law Enforcement (LE’s) there was 3 cars all heading towards the dorm Tom went to. It seems Tom had gone into a Female dorm. Tom said later he went in saw the sign on the door for the bathroom and went into the stall and did his thing. He said as he was standing there he heard the shower running and thought he would jump in real quick. (Remember alcohol is involved)  So he strips down and hops into the big communal shower, much to the surprise of the female already in there!!, she screamed, he screamed and someone call the police! The next day the commander and the 1st shirt called the rest of us up the hanger and asked us why we didn’t go into the dorm to use the bathroom and get Tom out of there, I remember saying something like I went before we left the club or something like that. One guy looked the commander in the eye and said “Sir I’m not going to lie to you, I was so drunk these fellas helped me walk to the bus stop, I didn’t see a dorm so I just peed on the tree next to the bus”. The next Friday night the bus was parked in front of the club and the driver asked if you went to the bathroom before you got on!  |
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Bullhunter
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Post by Bullhunter on Jan 13, 2009 5:43:38 GMT 9
Oh Jeff, that is just too dam funny.  |
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F106lady
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Post by F106lady on Feb 27, 2009 5:11:34 GMT 9
I stumbled across a patch on a site that Mark linked me to. Brought back this memory... TDY to Germany with A-10s from the 23 TFW, 76th TFS/AMU. Home station was England AFB, LA. One of my fellow crew chiefs was, and still is, a good friend. His nickname was Goose. It was akin to his last name and had been acquired long before the Top Gun movie hit the big screen. I'd had two years of German in high school. Not enough to be fluent, but enough to get me in trouble Since our TDY base was a German AB we intermingled with many of the German military assigned there, as well as the locals. Goose wanted to breech the language barrier and asked me to teach him to say " My name is Goose" in German. After much coaching I got him to sound out (not sure if I spelled this right) " Ich bin ein dumi-ganz" well enough that a local could understand him. The translation for " Ich bin ein dumi-ganz"... well it wasn't exactly what I had led Goose to believe  Goose was on a different shift than I was, so it was about a week later before he finally tracked me down. He was almost swinging his fists at me he was so mad. You see not only I had taught him to say " I am a dumb goose" but " I am a dumb female goose"  |
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Post by Jeff Shannon on Feb 27, 2009 6:04:31 GMT 9
I stumbled across a patch on a site that Mark linked me to. Brought back this memory... TDY to Germany with A-10s from the 23 TFW, 76th TFS/AMU. Home station was England AFB, LA. One of my fellow crew chiefs was, and still is, a good friend. His nickname was Goose. It was akin to his last name and had been acquired long before the Top Gun movie hit the big screen. I'd had two years of German in high school. Not enough to be fluent, but enough to get me in trouble Since our TDY base was a German AB we intermingled with many of the German military assigned there, as well as the locals. Goose wanted to breech the language barrier and asked me to teach him to say " My name is Goose" in German. After much coaching I got him to sound out (not sure if I spelled this right) " Ich bin ein dumi-ganz" well enough that a local could understand him. The translation for " Ich bin ein dumi-ganz"... well it wasn't exactly what I had led Goose to believe Goose was on a different shift than I was, so it was about a week later before he finally tracked me down. He was almost swinging his fists at me he was so mad. You see not only I had taught him to say " I am a dumb goose" but " I am a dumb female goose" OHH that was good! We use to put engine exhaust soot on the headsets for the new guys launching jets. We being as I worked out of the phase docks we started putting on the telephone and go to an office in the hanger and wait for our intended victim to enter the office and call the extension. There were a lot of "black" ears for about 6 months. oh yea we also used ketchup, mustard, grease, if kind of got out of hand towards the end  |
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Bullhunter
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Post by Bullhunter on Feb 27, 2009 6:05:56 GMT 9
F106lady that is funny: That reminds me on my first month living in Germany. We lived in a small German village not far from Sembach Air Base. My wife at the time injured her foot. We had not met many of our German neighbors except to just wave at each other and say "Gooden Tag, Gooden Morgen, etc" I picked up the simple things like how to order Bier quickly. This one afternoon after I brought my wife home and pulled into the alley-way/drive-way between our house our german neighbor the old German man opened his shuttesr facing our drive and said "Gooden tag" meaning good-day. I replid the same in return. He then asked about my wife limping. I understood what he was asking, but didn't know the German to describe her injured foot. As his elderly wife looked out the window with him I did my best to explain her injury in German words. I said:....................... "Frau Kaputt Foot" I put an "s" on foot to make it sound more German. " Foots" Foots and the German word "Fotze" sound the same I guess. I was very proud of my quick German communication skills. I figured I'd quickly said, "Wife injured foot" The old man's wife turned redish in the face and pulled back inside the window out of sight. The old gentleman just shook his head, smiled, and then closed the shutter. The next day at work I asked a few of the German workers what "Frau Kaputt Foot" really ment. What is your best quess  ?    What I really told our new German neighbor was: "Wife broke c _ _ t." Just goggle "fotze" if you can't figure it out. I was very careful what I tried to say in German after that.  |
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F106lady
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Post by F106lady on Feb 27, 2009 8:48:47 GMT 9
Oh I knew the exact translation well maybe not the part about a female goose... but I knew that dumi-ganz translated to dumb gooseGoose had fallen for it hook line and sinker :green-smile |
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We were at the club most of the night and time came to catch the last bus back to the hotel. Now they didn’t park the buses anywhere near the club and we all had to walk a couple of blocks to where they were. We arrive at the designated area and the bus driver said the bus won’t start and he had called base motor pool for another bus and a tow truck. Were all standing around waiting for the bus when Tom says he has to go to the bathroom, and starts off towards a dorm. 
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