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Post by steve201 (deceased) on Nov 20, 2009 5:11:10 GMT 9
Did you know: A. That the words "race car" spelled backward still spells "race car?" B. That "eat" is the only word that if you take the 1st letter and move it to the last, it spells its past tense "ate?" C. And have you noticed that if you rearrange the letters in "illegal immigrants" and add just a few more letters, it spells out: "Go home you free-loading, benefit-grabbing, welfare spawn-producing, violent, non-English speaking (edit) and take those other hairy-faced, sandal- wearing, bomb-making, goat-loving, raggedy-ass b#stards with you?" How weird is that??? : :salute Steve
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Post by pat perry on Nov 22, 2009 10:28:06 GMT 9
Home remedies are always helpful... Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer. A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives; then you'll be afraid to cough. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them. AND, If you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical problem (this is especially helpful in aircraft maintenance).
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Post by Jim on Apr 13, 2010 4:09:30 GMT 9
How to positivily indentify a conservative........ (Not by what car he drives)
If you ever wondered which side of the fence you sit on, this is a great test!
If a conservative doesn't like guns, he doesn`t buy one. If a liberal doesn't like guns, he wants all guns outlawed. If a conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn`t eat meat. If a liberal is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone. If a conservative is homosexual, he quietly leads his life. If a liberal is homosexual, he demands legislated respect. If a conservative is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation. A liberal wonders who is going to take care of him. If a conservative doesn't like a talk show host, he switches channels. Liberals demand that those they don't like be shut down. If a conservative is a non-believer, he doesn't go to church. A liberal non-believer wants any mention of God and religion silenced. (Unless it's a foreign religion, of course!) If a conservative decides he needs health care, he goes about shopping for it, or may choose a job that provides it. A liberal demands that the rest of us pay for his. If a conservative reads this, he'll forward it so his friends can have a good laugh. A liberal will delete it because he's "offended". Well, I forwarded it to you so where does that put me?
The Old Sarge
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Post by steve201 (deceased) on Apr 13, 2010 6:59:52 GMT 9
well..I'm a conservative and have seen this one many times.... :drunk :thanks and i still get a laugh. :rofl ..and my liberal friends STILL get offended and demand I appologize for the offense.....gotta love it... :2thumbsup
steve
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Post by Jim on May 14, 2010 8:00:23 GMT 9
But, Do ye be a forwarding it to those nice liberals in your address book? After all, a friend will do anything for you, just like you would be doing for them when you fwd it to them......................... :rofl :rofl :drunk :drunk a round of applause for me foine Irish Tenors if ye please............. The Old Sarge
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Post by steve201 (deceased) on May 14, 2010 12:52:14 GMT 9
Oh yeah Baby!!!....I'll send it to everyone and anyone no matter what affiliation they are on.. : Steve
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