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Post by daoleguy A.J. Hoehn (deceased) on May 22, 2009 3:26:59 GMT 9
Many of us were Shift Leaders or Shop Chiefs. In that position we all dealt with tardiness for work. I am curious about some of the odd ball excuses we heard. I sure had a few lu-lu's. Two that pop into mind were from the same guy. The Airman, Cy, was a good kid. Bright and a good worker, but quirky. Cy was a nerdy type, degreed in biology and cerebral by nature. I enjoyed chatting with him about science, after all I was a fellow nerd of sorts too.
After inheriting a shop due to retirement of the MSgt running it, I as a SSgt with 6 years time in service took over managing twelve troops. It was interesting to say the least. Cy was our comic relief being like Ensign Parker by nature. I am sure you folks know the type. Anyhow he really had me amused in a way with his comments and especially two reasons for being late for shift.
One morning it was pushing 0730 and no Cy yet. I started to send a troop across to the dorms to find him when he called. Note, he was not a drinker, just scatter brained. He was all flustered and stammered to me on the phone. When I finally got him settled down he explained why he was late. It seemed he liked fish, well breeding them - Guppies. This paticular morning he got up at 0500 and found the female brooding. Cy got wrapped up in ensuring the safety of the babies and lost track of time. We all roared about his excuse and were humored when he came in and told his tale of midwifing guppies. We gave him a goldfish for the shop.
His best excuse was at a later date. It was 0745 and no Cy. About to send a guy to find him and the phone rang, Cy blurted apologies and proceeded to try to explain his dilema. This was a winner. He claimed he was locked in the latrine stall and was calling me to let me know why he was late. Hmm, in the stall? There were no cell phones in 1975 so how was he calling me? I let him ramble and then asked about the phone and stall. Cy froze on the line and sputtered unintelligible comments.
Finally I heard laughter in the background and the bay orderly took the phone. He explained Cy had used a stall in the latrine and the door fell off wedging him on the crapper. Also the side privacy panel had fallen on him. Panicked he just started calling for help. A couple guys extricated him and poor Cy was scared he would be in trouble. For 30 minutes he tried to fix the stall while guys stood laughing. Believe it or not he repaired it. It seemed the bay orderly earlier had not hung a sign to not use that stall until CE repaired it.
The poor kid took a real ribbing from us and the dorm mates. One guy went far enough to put a toy phone in our shop latrine. Another guy brought his kids walkie talkies to work and when Cy headed off to the crapper they offered him one "Just in case". Overall he was a good kid and got to take the ribbing in stride. In a way the joke came back on us.
A few months later Cy got orders... to OCS. Boy did we howl about that. Ensign Parker was to be a reality. I don't know what became of him as an officer, but always wondered. Knowing the USAF he probably went on to make a Flag Grade.
AJ
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Bullhunter
Global Moderator 
318th FIS Jet Shop 1975-78
Currently: Offline
Posts: 7,445 
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Joined: May 2005
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Post by Bullhunter on May 22, 2009 4:13:07 GMT 9
Honesty goes along way. i arrived at Sembach AB, West Germany and our aircraft had not arrived yet. We were just on and off helping the CH-53 Jolly Green troops out.
One morning a new SSgt was almost two hours late for work. Now in Germany out in the villages we couldn't afford telephones.
For recalls the furtherest man out was provided a phone and when I was rcalled he stopped and notified people along his route.
He finely shows up and being late was no big problem as we had no aircraft to work on yet, but the SMSgt we all worked for was worried. His deal was that if the missing troop was injured or killed and he did not report that person late he would be introuble. We all understand that.
Anyway the SMSgt asked him straight out infront of everyone why he was 2 hours late.
He looked around and then said, "Well, the truth is I just got my wife over here from the states last week and this morning we felt like doing it." The SMSgt was a fun guy and without cracking a smile he snapped back, "DOING WHAT?!"
The poor guy had to explain that his wife and he were having some great sexual sports.
You know, I never recall him being late after that.
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Post by lindel on May 22, 2009 7:03:15 GMT 9
Best story I ever heard for being late (I wasn't the supe, I was just within earshot) was that the troop's parrot was sitting on the snooze button. The supe told me later that he let it go because it was either real, or very creative... :green-beer
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